The Last Thing He Wanted: What Do Alzheimer's Patients Really Want?

"Being left alone to die without family or friends, was the last thing this man wanted," commented Nick, the orderly, to Dr. Montana, the resident physician for the nursing home. "They should have been here with him."

"Sometimes I wonder what Alzheimer's patients really want," he replied. "Unfortunately, I may not see them until they are long past the stage of knowing what they want, or being able to tell us. Then, of course, it may be too late."

"I can understand how that happens," Nick replied, but inwardly, he felt heartsick. He was one of the few staff members with the patience to relate to the elderly man who had just passed away. He knew this patient to be a kind and loving individual, but realized that not everyone felt the same way about him now. There had been many difficult times, as the staff was generally overworked, and  far too busy to spend time with him.

"Such is the nature of Alzheimer's disease," Dr. Montana continued. "Many patients have insulted, offended or even abused those in their own worlds, long before I see them. They may have completely forgotten who their family and friends are and driven them away as strangers, not realizing what they need the most is to have them around. It is worse when they have dementia, because they are out of touch with reality."

Dr. Montana knew Nick was upset, but he could also see the elderly man's daughter waiting patiently, beside the nurse's station. He had to talk to her, too. 

"This family has always been kind, considerate and loving to him," he said to Nick. "There is nothing more we can do for him, so now he is in their hands."

"Unfortunately, many of these families take better care of their dead than they do of their living," replied Nick, sadly.

"Don't be too hard on them," suggested Dr. Montana. "It is not as if they have not tried."